lay a-limp

lay a-limp

by the smile of a foe,
lay a-limp.

the age toll unfolds
lay a-limp

little becomes worth
lay a-limp

thoughts stillborn at birth
lay a-limp

the vague of a purpose
lay a-limp

blame it all on curse
lay a-limp

under sands lies dreams,
and so a body lies limp,
under weight faith sinks,
to rest we lay a-limp


...after all it's just a limp.


apoet 25 dec 2007 (1.34am)

your snobbish behaviour is really making us.. "fucking hostile."

19th Dec 2007.
As we got on a lift and pressed 4th floor, a lady was already inside and she had pressed 13 floor. As the lift door closed we realised that we had got on the wrong block. We tried to pressed the open door button but it was too late, thus we decided to pressed the next nearest floor so that we can get out. The lady inside said " hey you cannot pressed the other floor. I already press 13th, so you must wait, I got here first."

20th Dec 2007
We got on a lift at causeway point. The lift was nearly full. As the door was closing, and it open again, a lady with two kids, carrying one and holding the hand of another one, got into the lift. And the door close. On the next floor the lady with the kids got off. And the door closed. An animal looking woman who is in the nearly full lift, spoke to her husband with her own two kids in the lift too and said : "one floor only also must take lift, this type of people so stupid, one floor also want to take cannot walk? so damn stupid. "

greatest gift of love

Many years the man will be tormented , many years the man would be eyed as a failure via the co-cohabitant's that shared the land with him. He had lived in solitude for many years. And for ALL years of him, shall he be living alone, and eventually to die alone. Yet , for all this is his preference, his choice, his gift for the greatest love possible.

When the time came for him becoming a age for marriage. He had denied it. And many yet passed and he held on to being alone. And thru the years when his peers down and soak in the sweet nectar of companionship's and relationships. He held none, retracting deep into his own dark world of silence and loneliness, yet knowingly holding out for love. And when the years of youth had pass and he no longer wish for companionship, the joy of kids and children soak his heart into the saddest years possible only by swans. Yet he held on. He did not had any children and had stopped himself to have any children, nor kids. They have called him, strange , cold and twisted. But he held on, for love. Leaving old age alone. Missing the joy of cuddling his own children and sweetness of a warm home. He live in his own large house, rich as he is but alone and cold, yet he held on for love. And finally in his last years, they asked him why? why has he wasted a FULL lifetime and till death, missing out love for a partner and love for children, these experiences are such wonderful experiences that they cannot be associate with anything else, except living thru them yourself. Why has he wasted his own life and choose such a cold solitude one.

With a voice,long cursed by age and time. And a smile un tinted by the world. He say " I have held on a life time for love. God has create us, and gave us the ability to love. And I am using it. Though God gave us love, such a eternal thing, but he did not gave us eternal life to enjoy love. Not the love with the ones we want to be together with. God has make separation mandatory, by death. And cursed man with disease.

I have seen the joy of kids. And I have seen my joy of me and my beloved children in my visions. And I love them so much, so much more than myself. I love my wife so much, in my vision that I would suffer for all suffering that might ever be bestowed unto her. And that is why I save them from all the pain they would have to go thru. I did not have kids, because I love my children so much in my visions. I have chose to not bring them to bloody earth. For children, are so pure and innocent, I believe they came from heaven

I choose and let them stay on in heaven.

no matter how bitter I am and alone to die cold on earth. My heart burns fierce flames of contentment for I know the ones I love, remains un scarred in heaven.

day of letter

not today.

Start : 9.43am
ten mins ago I started worrying about the things that I do so that I can live, to please the ones who gives me life. Well I chose them to be the ones whom will be giving me life. Weird huh? And every ten mins or so, I get to remember that the ONE has decided not to give me joy. And my joy is dependent on time frames and different windows required different incidents or physical things that will be capable to seek me joy. This window, the current one I have none.
End : 9.47pm

Start :10.14am
every recurrences or relay of the incident in my mind brings such pain and disappointment..of un acceptance. Yet though I am mundane compared to goddesses I know. that brave fields or thorns instead of just wearing them on the head. They swim in twigs and ran thru fields filled with pikes and diseases of mankind. And while they carry it they still have to go thru the everyday lovers immature request for physical and emotion requirements and desire satisfaction. I need to do a spell check at this point
End : 10.18am

Start :11:42am
you start the dog with a rubber tube or wood pole. And everytime you pass by the dog, you hit it on it's nose, hit it on it's head, once or twice maybe more, as wished. it's regular but then again it's not constant. You know it will be repeated but just not sure when. Til it dies I guess...why do do this? we don't need to. oh come on, do you do things only when you need to? do you celebrate chirstmas, birthdays and whatever , because you need too? do you have sex becuase you need too? we don't. We still do it. Because we do. Not really becuase we like it. But we do it. Like we smile at our neighbours when we see them. Do we need too? no. do we look forward to smile at them, because we like too? no. But we do anyhow.

ps:..., it just keeps coming back.
End :11.51am

Sons

SILENT WATERS

A day’s light told me of my son’s fate
The sun showed the way, grim and severe
Pulled under the raging waters, my child
Sank in the drowning currents, my son

My strength is not enough, my powers failed me
I need the heavens’ help, I ask for thunder’s force
I plead for you, oh lightning, forge an iron tool
A magic rake for dragging a river for my son

God of fire, bring your light
Forger of sun, help me now
Guardian of the shore will sleep in your warmth
Lull the folk of cold water
Banish the serpents of the dark
To the river let me go and fetch my son away

A rake made of iron from the Gods of skies
The spirit of bright days sent me the sun
Cold troops of Tuoni can not stand in my way
Untouched I shall walk by the river of the night

My child
My son

Slient Waters By Amorphis


Chee Wei Cheng, 20
Jeremy Goh, 24
Stephen Loh, 31
Poh Boon San, 27
Reuben Kee, 23

Be with peace

: Book of Common Prayer (1559) :

Book of Common Prayer (1559)
Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation. But deliver us from evil. Amen.

..

But yet so I speaketh :

XIAMIEN ! ,
evil, from us deliver temptation into,
but not us lead.
us, against trespass, that them forgave us
trespasses ours us forgive.
daily bread ours this day us gave.
Heaven as it is on earth!
DONE be thy will and thy come kingdom!
name thy be hallowed, for
heaven in art , father ours!

Xiamien.

sad lion

a personal pain

four sides of Flanders

Hold that fuck mind, await that fuck time, this the gallery of flesh.
Drunk the birth's blood, play the vic's part, rough toy for 20 bucks.
release sea like, to ants let's come tight, tis some mother's plight.
drop your shit grace, wonder your foot's place? you dream to shove like an ace !
hold the legs wide, dry of sex tide, the sick will provide the slide
oh fuck your mild god, meek at sex lords, yet this thy disciples horde
heads they try cut, babylon regrows part, cum on the sacred heart !
try not to act like, when shy your folds hide,violence in sex brights eyes
righteous the act's like, finger the poor cunt, better you and your aunt!!!
cover bed unders, done with vile wonders, walk limp the four side of flanders.


Copyrighted, apoet 30 NOV 2007
..



unlike it's sisters, whom comes alive in darkness, they busk in the high of noon. Where the sun lid up the faces of seekers whom might be ashame. They come in noon waiting. Maggots dive in and out of the various heat holes, that human say it's houses. Would they be surprise to see the people in there... the ones that walk the city streets so clean and with honour. Will they be surprise to see their husbands there, collecting a fatal disease. There is a world that they do not know and am too wimp to know. Do not try to pretend you know, and try to get an association. The real do not talk. Unlike the fake who talk the walk. Thy sick purity is a stench to the hard-lines.

Bitter Jealousy

they who do not deserved and received. They whom speak in disgrace in the name of gods have been blessed. They who water not the fields with sweat nor blood hath reap sweets fruits. They whom hath not honour the gods have received their graces. And so HE shall re-just the balance tonight. ..HE shall leave for the brave of justice, of balance and to give what they have not received... pain and punishment.



..the bleeding has come to it's last ... the thaw is almost gone. almost done.

in queue

There are lot of people waiting. I wonder if there are actually standing or sitting or squatting.. But it seems there were all waiting. Almost stretching out their hands,.. and they stand one after another , in a queue. And along that line they stretch out their hands , for those things to come to pass.

Those things come at quite a speed, blades and all, coming fast towards the queue of reaching out hands... and it slices off . Those who did not reach out far enough only get part of their fingers sliced off, those who did far enough managed to get their hands sliced off. Thus shortening their reach. But these people are consistent. After some time, they will grow back these hands and start reaching out again, and those things would come and redo the slicing over again.

the call for the mad arab

IA! IA! ZI AZAG!
IA! IA! ZI AZKAK!
IA! IA! KUTULU ZI KUR!
IA! where of the earth black and off you have tread and wrote. And hath thee no protection from ANU? else how art thou be torn across the vast space of the outside? Of which hath thee kept closed? where the ancient ones lay alseep and awaits...or have thee left that to us along with thy unfinished words. I wonder at thy passing at the gate ARZIR, and indeed hath thou survive the realms of the foul IGIGI? ah, forgive me by motality a mortal. For I am with little manners, but words spoken ...with judgement. I sound the name of the commander of legions the wind demons as you did who fought the ancient tiamat alongside with marduk kurios, and it's name in fifth is luggaldimmerankia ! ! ! ! in which take me ! ! ! ! which you could have done?

the first leap

the walls tumbling down, loud thunders glooms above...and the ground cracked up so much, earth is in pain. And man colour the soil red and black by the nature of thier will and flesh of thier own. And pain wears everything. cries litter the streets and homes...the hopeless wail. and all is because, of the unbearing nature to disasociate .. reality daggers in deep.

Enough time has passed.

And the emerger is created. the first one who realise, the cause will see the lore and the retification , the first one as we saw it now, leap up across and above us, in such lightness that ALL admire. In a woeless manner it will fly, across and above human's web of mudane squbbles, useless plotting and banishing of each other , and many other mentality filth and disease.

you have no pain

look ! how cursed you are.??? rubber melts with time into the wood. becoming one. Time tell the aged. .. and she left for us a wrenched face. Frozen in time. For all of the world to see, a hope. Telling the world of a time of unearthly pain. Immoral and immortal. A legacy is keep thus for the wise to learn. Of a time dark and unspeakable, far beyond tis time of the world. where man and beast no longer separates. Two nines rivet each of her keel cap joints. To facilitate of movement. Iron nails were driven into the flesh of her foot where toes should be but missing. These irons nails facilitated her walk do liketh what toes do to prevent the upright man from falling forward. 10 shorts nails each hammered into the front of her feet. Her eye lids were sewn unto her forehead to prevent sleep, and her eyes and turn crimson from the lack of moisture and bleeding...her teeth were saw off half way to expose the dentin and pulp of all her teeth...and for every breath she breaths it goes direct to her brains and nerves..and they wanted her to smile... and sliced her mouth, widen it all the way to her ears... both side.

And all of us,.. all die unsung.

"Are we not all predatory animals by instinct? If human ceased wholly from preying upon each other, could they continue to exist?"
The infernal Diatribe III:4

changed

mummy mummy mummy ! carry me ! like you used to be when times were different and everything was younger....mummy mummy mummy why do you ignore me? where you never did where things were simpler. Mummy mummy mummy, do matter how much I cried and tears soak my cheeks and my face swollen to redness, thing don't seem to be back the same again. No matter how hard I cried....Mummy mummy mummy, hold me in my nightmares, in the dark like you used to, where now you do not anymore...You are the only thing I know....something has changed, and problems that you will solve for me, everything. I run to you...mummy mummy mummy, we both have grown with time, ..oh I seek everything of your approval and support and with your encourage I will shine I will be courageous, and brave...but only with you, for I have tread without your smile and thus live with fear, and cold, mummy mummy mummy, tell me you are here, tell me you will be there for me , no matter how old I am how what I have done, ...mummy, I have gown too big and I know my problems has now become too big for you to help me....mummy I know you would always want to help me, even though you could not, your tears tell me that , if I die it's because you had no choice...my problems are now too much for you...not like when I was younger...mummy.

"...Mother is God in the eyes of a child..."
:Rose ( Silent Hill )

made to kneel

from the start of everything, man. He was made to kneel. We were made to be submissive. And along the line, we deviated. And they got angry. It dawn unto us, that we were made to to kneel, made to submit, at least meant to be lower to submit, and all likeness of man are meant this way. In man I meant both man and woman. Our kind were made to be a supporting race. to belong to be owned. And yet not the animals who we look down upon. They weren't meant to kneel. That's why, some of us change and mutate and took on other forms. They were mean to just lower their bodies, BUT only man , were disgraced and mean to kneel, we have to change in form if we choose otherwise, this is obvious.

Our knees the bend forwards and we put our knees on the earth . But the cloven hoofs their knees or so what they have bend back wards, and they were never to be control nor be submissive. They were meant never to belong or to kneel. I see now why, the ancient light bear the likeness of a man yet with a lower form of a goat, where cloven hoofs and legs bend backwards... to never kneel. To not bow.

Ours is a cursed race.

when were our first tears?

oust and burdened with the accusation the he shall led his ever time line of children to a world of pain and suffering. He must have cried. I guessed. Or was almost prefect man able to cry? the same goes for woman. Were they capable of emotions or were closer to angels? whom take no sides and are nonchalant to the woes of mortals. If there were tears, were they meant for ourselves or for our children? which is sadder ....I fear the later. I fear the responsibility of eternal prosecution. Where the worst comes from thyself. one that cannot be reasoned away. Was it worth the cause and the gain? is truth necessary ? it truth ever worth it in trade of oblivion and foolish BUT forever happiness. I wonder will I choose insanity and remain happy forever or sane but in pain if the world. I console him in his death, that he held love in his hand...yet did he find this on his own or it seems ..that it was given to him..and love cannot exist in this way of painless, woe-less and untiring times....Oh first man, I too seem to have deviated. Yet I wonder if there is right in that as I speak it....I asked if he had daughters for it seems the stories goes no. And then how art me ? ... but what cause is this? hark ! senseless and I have dwell. ...

The respond : http://www.Keep377A.com

"Dears,

If the institution of the family is important to you, please speak up by supporting this petition to keep Section 377A of the Penal Code, which prohibits gay sex in Singapore.

It's time we speak.

Please visit http://www.Keep377A.com to sign the petition today.

Best regards."
http://www.Keep377A.com

...not here.

I did not start here.

there is history beyond this. And it is written at apoet.multiply.com